What I want....

Cuddled cozily in my mother's womb, I wanted to see this mundane world.
Stepping into this world, staggering and floundering, I wanted to cross the threshold and explore.
Burdened with a satchel, I wanted to reach new heights in academia.

Now, I stand bedeviled at my state of affairs.
I crave for affluence, and highlife.
All that I want is fleeting and vanishes within no time.
Having lost focus, I wander aimlessly looking for an answer.

I don't know what I really want...

The Greatest Tormentor...

Born and reared as a gullible and naive child, little did I know about the ways of the world.

I grew up to be ingenuous and pliable to emotions and sentiments.

My claims that I am a strong minded woman came out to be just a myth.

If being confident, determined and persevered is what "Strong" meant, then yes I am.

Yet, there are certain arenas of my life where I miserably failed.

Failed to take the hints to withdraw myself and stayed on only to face more emotional anguish.

I let these emotions creep into my mind slowly and let it conquer my mind to the hilt..

My crystal clear mind sans turbulence was disturbed by none but myself.

The greatest tormentor is none but I....

Strange isnt it??

Life is very strange...
We meet strangers in every walk of life..

I was taught to be wary of strangers. Yet, I meet with them, befriend them, care for them, trust them, laugh with them, cry for them, love them, and live for them...

I become a part of them.
They become a part of me.

Once strangers, now consume my life...

Strange isnt it??!!!

Horo(r)scope

Horoscope.. A sheet of paper with diagrams.. One that is going to tell me what I was in the past, what I am in the present and what I will be in the future...
And all this comes from a mere DTP (date, time, place)
Perplexed??!!!

Eversince my younger days I've never believed in horoscopes. All I thought of it was fun.. Fun to know what a third person has to say about my life by looking at the diagrams. I'm a believer of clairvoyance, ESP and all the scientific stuff...But when it comes to the predictions based on planetary positions and the advantage fake astrologers take with weak minded people.. It puts me off.

According to me, any person is likely to get influenced by any sort of details bout his/her life. Words have power absolutely. Positive words have a positive effect on us, and negative words have a negative effect....It's common that people tend to live their lives based on the predictions and correlate each and every happenin to it..

All I reckon is this..."belief in myself" is what is going to work out and there is nothin in this world that can influence me or my way of life.. And there is no line or a box that can tell me how I will be in the future..

And finally an interesting line from the Alchemist ,"If good things are coming, they will be a pleasant surprise. If bad things are, and you know in advance, you will suffer greatly before they even occur."

Disclaimer: All written here are purely based on individuals (my) views and are not intended to hurt others or change their convictions...

Stacked up rants....

It's been a year since I became a blogger...Passive though.. Everytime I stumble upon this blog page, I attempt to put up something that has been lingering in my mind, but never had the guts to let it go public or the patience to feed the blog.

Even now as I sit in front of the monitor hoping to rake up the strength to put up what i feel about myself and the things that have happened in the last few years, I fumble...

My life has been pretty good from the beginning. I've had the best of things right on my lap. I never had the trouble of getting things. They fell right in my place. I was in a world of my own with the nicest things happening. My folks never let me struggle for anything. I was very much petted and pampered (and this stays on, with a few changes appended to it).

At some point we realise that this is not what life is and try to break through the confinement. That's when we try to handle things and take decisions on our own.

I now realise, I have the freedom (which I once thought I never had) to choose what I want and hold on to what I believe. Absolutely free to pursue my interests. I'm tasting the true taste of freedom. Time has taught me that trivial things don't account for "being independent". Independence lies in choosing, at this age, what I think is right for me and for my future.

"You life is in your hands" is what my dad advocates to me.. No matter what I choose, his only piece of advice is that my life is in my hands and my triumphs or failures can be attributed to none but myself.

Now I've grown up to be an individual who believes not in fate or destiny but "myself".
I am what I think whole day long.
I am today where my thoughts have brought me, I will be tomorrow where my thoughts take me.....